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FALSTAFF
Sayest thou so, old Jack? go thy ways; I'll make
more of thy old body than I have done. Will they
yet look after thee? Wilt thou, after the expense
of so much money, be now a gainer? Good body, I
thank thee. Let them say 'tis grossly done; so it be
fairly done, no matter.
Enter BARDOLPH
BARDOLPH
Sir John, there's one Master Brook below would fain
speak with you, and be acquainted with you; and hath
sent your worship a morning's draught of sack.
FALSTAFF
Brook is his name?
BARDOLPH
Ay, sir.
FALSTAFF
Call him in.
Exit BARDOLPH
Such Brooks are welcome to me, that o'erflow such
liquor. Ah, ha! Mistress Ford and Mistress Page
have I encompassed you? go to; via!
Re-enter BARDOLPH, with FORD disguised
FORD
Bless you, sir!
FALSTAFF
And you, sir! Would you speak with me?
FORD
I make bold to press with so little preparation upon
you.
FALSTAFF
You're welcome. What's your will? Give us leave, drawer.
Exit BARDOLPH
FORD
Sir, I am a gentleman that have spent much; my name is Brook.
FALSTAFF
Good Master Brook, I desire more acquaintance of you.
FORD
Good Sir John, I sue for yours: not to charge you;
for I must let you understand I think myself in
better plight for a lender than you are: the which
hath something embolden'd me to this unseasoned
intrusion; for they say, if money go before, all
ways do lie open.
FALSTAFF
Money is a good soldier, sir, and will on.
FORD
Troth, and I have a bag of money here troubles me:
if you will help to bear it, Sir John, take all, or
half, for easing me of the carriage.
FALSTAFF
Sir, I know not how I may deserve to be your porter.
FORD
I will tell you, sir, if you will give me the hearing.
FALSTAFF
Speak, good Master Brook: I shall be glad to be
your servant.
FORD
Sir, I hear you are a scholar,--I will be brief
with you,--and you have been a man long known to me,
though I had never so good means, as desire, to make
myself acquainted with you. I shall discover a
thing to you, wherein I must very much lay open mine
own imperfection: but, good Sir John, as you have
one eye upon my follies, as you hear them unfolded,
turn another into the register of your own; that I
may pass with a reproof the easier, sith you
yourself know how easy it is to be such an offender.
FALSTAFF
Very well, sir; proceed.
FORD
There is a gentlewoman in this town; her husband's
name is Ford.
FALSTAFF
Well, sir.
FORD
I have long loved her, and, I protest to you,
bestowed much on her; followed her with a doting
observance; engrossed opportunities to meet her;
fee'd every slight occasion that could but niggardly
give me sight of her; not only bought many presents
to give her, but have given largely to many to know
what she would have given; briefly, I have pursued
her as love hath pursued me; which hath been on the
wing of all occasions. But whatsoever I have
merited, either in my mind or, in my means, meed,
I am sure, I have received none; unless experience
be a jewel that I have purchased at an infinite
rate, and that hath taught me to say this:
'Love like a shadow flies when substance love pursues;
Pursuing that that flies, and flying what pursues.'
FALSTAFF
Have you received no promise of satisfaction at her hands?
FORD
Never.
FALSTAFF
Have you importuned her to such a purpose?
FORD
Never.
FALSTAFF
Of what quality was your love, then?
FORD
Like a fair house built on another man's ground; so
that I have lost my edifice by mistaking the place
where I erected it.
FALSTAFF
To what purpose have you unfolded this to me?
FORD
When I have told you that, I have told you all.
Some say, that though she appear honest to me, yet in
other places she enlargeth her mirth so far that
there is shrewd construction made of her. Now, Sir
John, here is the heart of my purpose: you are a
gentleman of excellent breeding, admirable
discourse, of great admittance, authentic in your
place and person, generally allowed for your many
war-like, court-like, and learned preparations.
FALSTAFF
O, sir!
FORD
Believe it, for you know it. There is money; spend
it, spend it; spend more; spend all I have; only
give me so much of your time in exchange of it, as
to lay an amiable siege to the honesty of this
Ford's wife: use your art of wooing; win her to
consent to you: if any man may, you may as soon as
any.
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