There is nothing more useful nor more pleasant than to have wings.
To begin with, just let us suppose a spectator to be dying with hunger
and to be weary of the choruses of the tragic poets; if he were
winged, he would fly off, go home to dine and come back with his
stomach filled. Some Patroclides in urgent need would not have to
soil his cloak, but could fly off, satisfy his requirements, and,
having recovered his breath, return. If one of you, it matters not who,
had adulterous relations and saw the husband of his mistress
in the seats of the senators, he might stretch his wings, fly thither,
and, having appeased his craving, resume his place. Is it not
the most priceless gift of all, to be winged? Look at Diitrephes![18]
His wings were only wicker-work ones, and yet he got himself chosen
Phylarch and then Hipparch; from being nobody, he has risen
to be famous; 'tis now the finest gilded cock of his tribe.[19]
f[1] The actor, representing Procne, was a flute-player.
f[2] The parabasis.
f[3] A sophist of the island of Ceos, a disciple of Protagoras,
as celebrated for his knowledge as for his eloquence. The Athenians
condemned him to death as a corrupter of youth in 396 B.C.
f[4] Lovers were wont to make each other presents of birds. The cock
and the goose are mentioned, of course, in jest.
f[5] i.e. that it gave notice of the approach of winter, during which
season the Ancients did not venture to sea.
f[6] A notorious robber.
f[7] Meaning, "We are your oracles." --Dodona was an oracle in Epirus.
--The temple of Zeus there was surrounded by a dense forest, all
the trees of which were endowed with the gift of prophecy; both
the sacred oaks and the pigeons that lived in them answered
the questions of those who came to consult the oracle in pure Greek.
f[8] The Greek word for 'omen' is the same as that for 'bird.'
f[9] A satire on the passion of the Greeks for seeing an omen
in everything.
f[10] An imitation of the nightingale's song.
f[11] God of the groves and wilds.
f[12] The 'Mother of the Gods'; roaming the mountains, she held dances,
always attended by Pan and his accompanying rout of Fauns and Satyrs.
f[13] An allusion to cock-fighting; the birds are armed with brazen spurs.
f[14] An allusion to the spots on this bird, which resemble the scars
left by a branding iron.
f[15] He was of Asiatic origin, but wished to pass for an Athenian.
f[16] Or Philamnon, King of Thrace; the scholiast remarks that
the Phrygians and the Thracians had a common origin.
f[17] The Greek word here is also the name of a little bird.
f[18] A basket-maker who had become rich. --The Phylarchs were the
headmen of the tribes. They presided at the private assemblies
and were charged with the management of the treasury. --The Hipparchs,
as the name implies, were the leaders of the cavalry; there were
only two of these in the Athenian army.
f[19] He had become a senator.
PISTHETAERUS
Halloa! What's this? By Zeus! I never saw anything so funny in all
my life.[1]
f[1] Pisthetaerus and Euelpides now both return with wings.
EUELPIDES
What makes you laugh?
PISTHETAERUS
'Tis your bits of wings. D'you know what you look like? Like a goose
painted by some dauber-fellow.
EUELPIDES
And you look like a close-shaven blackbird.
PISTHETAERUS
'Tis ourselves asked for this transformation, and, as Aeschylus
has it, "These are no borrowed feathers, but truly our own."[1]
f[1] Meaning, 'tis we who wanted to have these wings. --The verse
from Aeschylus, quoted here, is taken from 'The Myrmidons,' a tragedy
of which only a few fragments remain.
EPOPS
Come now, what must be done?
PISTHETAERUS
First give our city a great and famous name, then sacrifice to the gods.
EUELPIDES
I think so too.
EPOPS
Let's see. What shall our city be called?
PISTHETAERUS
Will you have a high-sounding Laconian name? Shall we call it Sparta?
EUELPIDES
What! call my town Sparta? Why, I would not use esparto for my
bed,[1] even though I had nothing but bands of rushes.
f[1] The Greek word signified the city of Sparta, and also a kind
of broom used for weaving rough matting, which served for the beds
of the very poor.
PISTHETAERUS
Well then, what name can you suggest?
EUELPIDES
Some name borrowed from the clouds, from these lofty regions
in which we dwell--in short, some well-known name.
PISTHETAERUS
Do you like Nephelococcygia?[1]
f[1] A fanciful name constructed from [the word for] a cloud, and
[the word for] a cuckoo; thus a city of clouds and cuckoos.
--'Wolkenkukelheim' is a clever approximation in German.
Cloud-cuckoo-town, perhaps, is the best English equivalent.
EPOPS
Oh! capital! truly 'tis a brilliant thought!
EUELPIDES
Is it in Nephelococcygia that all the wealth of Theovenes[1] and most
of Aeschines'[2] is?
f[1] He was a boaster nicknamed 'smoke,' because he promised
a great deal and never kept his word.
f[2] Also mentioned in 'The Wasps.'
PISTHETAERUS
No, 'tis rather the plain of Phlegra,[1] where the gods withered
the pride of the sons of the Earth with their shafts.
f[1] Because the war of the Titans against the gods was only a fiction
of the poets.
EUELPIDES
Oh! what a splendid city! But what god shall be its patron?
for whom shall we weave the peplus?[1]
f[1] A sacred cloth, with which the statue of Athene in the Acropolis
was draped.
PISTHETAERUS
Why not choose Athene Polias?[1]
f[1] Meaning, to be patron-goddess of the city. Athene had a temple
of this name.
EUELPIDES
Oh! what a well-ordered town 'twould be to have a female deity
armed from head to foot, while Clisthenes[1] was spinning!
f[1] An Athenian effeminate, frequently ridiculed by Aristophanes.
PISTHETAERUS
Who then shall guard the Pelargicon?[1]
f[1] This was the name of the wall surrounding the Acropolis.
EPOPS
One of us, a bird of Persian strain, who is everywhere proclaimed to be
the bravest of all, a true chick of Ares.[1]
f[1] i.e. the fighting cock.
EUELPIDES
Oh! noble chick! What a well-chosen god for a rocky home!
PISTHETAERUS
Come! into the air with you to help the workers who are building
the wall; carry up rubble, strip yourself to mix the mortar, take up
the hod, tumble down the ladder, an you like, post sentinels, keep
the fire smouldering beneath the ashes, go round the walls, bell
in hand,[1] and go to sleep up there yourself; then d[i]spatch two
heralds, one to the gods above, the other to mankind on earth
and come back here.
f[1] To waken the sentinels, who might else have fallen asleep.
--There are several merry contradictions in the various parts
of this list of injunctions.
EUELPIDES
As for yourself, remain here, and may the plague take you for
a troublesome fellow!
PISTHETAERUS
Go, friend, go where I send you, for without you my orders
cannot be obeyed. For myself, I want to sacrifice to the new god,
and I am going to summon the priest who must preside at the ceremony.
Slaves! slaves! bring forward the basket and the lustral water.
CHORUS
I do as you do, and I wish as you wish, and I implore you to
address powerful and solemn prayers to the gods, and in addition to
immolate a sheep as a token of our gratitude. Let us sing the
Pythian chant in honour of the god, and let Chaeris accompany our
voices.
PISTHETAERUS (TO THE FLUTE-PLAYER)
Enough! but, by Heracles! what is this? Great gods! I have seen
many prodigious things, but I never saw a muzzled raven.[1]
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