PISTHETAERUS
I am bursting with desire to speak; I have already mixed the dough
of my address and nothing prevents me from kneading it.... Slave! bring
the chaplet and water, which you must pour over my hands. Be quick![1]
f[1] It was customary, when speaking in public and also at feasts,
to wear a chaplet; hence the question Euelpides puts. --The guests wore
chaplets of flowers, herbs, and leaves, which had the property of being
refreshing.
EUELPIDES
Is it a question of feasting? What does it all mean?
PISTHETAERUS
By Zeus, no! but I am hunting for fine, tasty words to break down
the hardness of their hearts. --I grieve so much for you, who
at one time were kings...
CHORUS
We kings! Over whom?
PISTHETAERUS
...of all that exists, firstly of me and of this man, even of Zeus
himself. Your race is older than Saturn, the Titans and the Earth.
CHORUS
What, older than the Earth!
PISTHETAERUS
By Phoebus, yes.
CHORUS
By Zeus, but I never knew that before!
PISTHETAERUS
'Tis because you are ignorant and heedless, and have never read
your Aesop. 'Tis he who tells us that the lark was born
before all other creatures, indeed before the Earth; his father died
of sickness, but the Earth did not exist then; he remained unburied
for five days, when the bird in its dilemma decided, for want of
a better place, to entomb its father in its own head.
EUELPIDES
So that the lark's father is buried at Cephalae.[1]
f[1] A deme of Attica. In Greek the word also means 'heads,'
and hence the pun.
EPOPS
Hence, if we existed before the Earth, before the gods,
the kingship belongs to us by right of priority.
EUELPIDES
Undoubtedly, but sharpen your beak well; Zeus won't be in a hurry
to hand over his sceptre to the woodpecker.
PISTHETAERUS
It was not the gods, but the birds, who were formerly the masters
and kings over men; of this I have a thousand proofs. First of all,
I will point you to the cock, who governed the Persians before
all other monarchs, before Darius and Megabyzus.[1] 'Tis in memory
of his reign that he is called the Persian bird.
f[1] One of Darius' best generals. After his expedition against
the Scythians, this prince gave him the command of the army which he
left in Europe. Megabyzus took Perinthos (afterwards called Heraclea)
and conquered Thrace.
EUELPIDES
For this reason also, even to-day, he alone of all the birds wears
his tiara straight on his head, like the Great King.[1]
f[1] All Persians wore the tiara, but always on one side; the Great King
alone wore it straight on his head.
PISTHETAERUS
He was so strong, so great, so feared, that even now, on account
of his ancient power, everyone jumps out of bed as soon as ever he
crows at daybreak. Blacksmiths, potters, tanners, shoemakers, bathmen,
corn-dealers, lyre-makers and armourers, all put on their shoes and
go to work before it is daylight.
EUELPIDES
I can tell you something about that. 'Twas the cock's fault
that I lost a splendid tunic of Phrygian wool. I was at a feast
in town, given to celebrate the birth of a child; I had drunk pretty
freely and had just fallen asleep, when a cock, I suppose in a greater
hurry than the rest, began to crow. I thought it was dawn and set
out for Alimos.[1] I had hardly got beyond the walls, when a footpad
struck me in the back with his bludgeon; down I went and wanted
to shout, but he had already made off with my mantle.
f[1] Noted as the birthplace of Thucydides, a deme of Attica of
the tribe of Leontis. Demosthenes tells us it was thirty-five stadia
from Athens.
PISTHETAERUS
Formerly also the kite was ruler and king over the Greeks.
EPOPS
The Greeks?
PISTHETAERUS
And when he was king, 'twas he who first taught them to fall
on their knees before the kites.[1]
f[1] The appearance of the kite in Greece betokened the return of
springtime; it was therefore worshipped as a symbol of that season.
EUELPIDES
By Zeus! 'tis what I did myself one day on seeing a kite; but
at the moment I was on my knees, and leaning backwards[1] with mouth
agape, I bolted an obolus and was forced to carry my bag home empty.[2]
f[1] To look at the kite, who no doubt was flying high in the sky.
f[2] As already shown, the Athenians were addicted to carrying small
coins in their mouths. --This obolus was for the purpose of buying flour
to fill the bag he was carrying
PISTHETAERUS
The cuckoo was king of Egypt and of the whole of Phoenicia. When
he called out "cuckoo," all the Phoenicians hurried to the fields to
reap their wheat and their barley.[1]
f[1] In Phoenicia and Egypt the cuckoo makes its appearance about
harvest-time.
EUELPIDES
Hence no doubt the proverb, "Cuckoo! cuckoo! go to the fields,
ye circumcised."[1]
f[1] This was an Egyptian proverb, meaning, 'When the cuckoo sings we
go harvesting.' Both the Phoenicians and the Egyptians practised
circumcision.
PISTHETAERUS
So powerful were the birds that the kings of Grecian cities,
Agamemnon, Menelaus, for instance, carried a bird on the tip of
their sceptres, who had his share of all presents.[1]
f[1] The staff, called a sceptre, generally terminated in a piece
of carved work, representing a flower, a fruit, and most often a bird.
EUELPIDES
That I didn't know and was much astonished when I saw Priam come
upon the stage in the tragedies with a bird, which kept watching
Lysicrates[1] to see if he got any present.
f[1] A general accused of treachery. The bird watches Lysicrates,
because, according to Pisthetaerus, he had a right to a share
of the presents.
PISTHETAERUS
But the strongest proof of all is, that Zeus, who now reigns, is
represented as standing with an eagle on his head as a symbol of his
royalty;[1] his daughter has an owl, and Phoebus, as his servant, has a
hawk.
f[1] It is thus that Phidias represents his Olympian Zeus.
EUELPIDES
By Demeter, 'tis well spoken. But what are all these birds doing
in heaven?
PISTHETAERUS
When anyone sacrifices and, according to the rite, offers the entrails
to the gods, these birds take their share before Zeus. Formerly men always
swore by the birds and never by the gods; even now Lampon[1] swears
by the goose,
when he wants to lie....Thus 'tis clear that you were great and
sacred, but now you
are looked upon as slaves, as fools, as Helots; stones are thrown
at you as at raving madmen, even in holy places. A crowd of
bird-catchers sets snares, traps, limed-twigs and nets of all sorts
for you; you are caught, you are sold in heaps and the buyers finger
you over to be certain you are fat. Again, if they would but serve you
up simply roasted; but they rasp cheese into a mixture of oil, vinegar
and laserwort, to which another sweet and greasy sauce is added,
and the whole is poured scalding hot over your back, for all the world
as if you were diseased meat.
f[1] One of the diviners sent to Sybaris (in Magna Graecia, S. Italy)
with the Athenian colonists, who rebuilt the town under the new name
of Thurium.
CHORUS
Man, your words have made my heart bleed; I have groaned over
the treachery of our fathers, who knew not how to transmit to us the
high rank they held from their forefathers. But 'tis a benevolent
Genius, a happy Fate, that sends you to us; you shall be our deliverer
and I place the destiny of my little ones and my own in your hands
with every confidence. But hasten to tell me what must be done;
we should not be worthy to live, if we did not seek to regain
our royalty by every possible means.
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