I want now to speak to the judges about the prize they are going
to award; if they are favourable to us, we will load them with
benefits far greater than those Paris[4] received. Firstly, the owls
of Laurium,[5] which every judge desires above all things, shall never
be wanting to you; you shall see them homing with you, building their
nests in your money-bags and laying coins. Besides, you shall be
housed like the gods, for we shall erect gables[6] over your dwellings;
if you hold some public post and want to do a little pilfering,
we will give you the sharp claws of a hawk. Are you dining in town,
we will provide you with crops.[7] But, if your award is against us,
don't fail to have metal covers fashioned for yourselves, like those
they place over statues;[8] else, look out! for the day you wear
a white tunic all the birds will soil it with their droppings.
f[1] A disciple of Democrites; he passed over from superstition
to atheism. The injustice and perversity of mankind led him to deny
the existence of the gods, to lay bare the mysteries and to break
the idols. The Athenians had put a price on his head, so he left Greece
and perished soon afterwards in a storm at sea.
f[2] By this jest Aristophanes means to imply that tyranny is dead, and
that no one aspires to despotic power, though this silly accusation
was constantly being raised by the demagogues and always favourably
received by the populace.
f[3] A poulterer. --Strouthian, used in joke to designate him, as if
from the name of his 'deme,' is derived from [the Greek for] 'a sparrow.'
The birds' foe is thus grotesquely furnished with an ornithological
surname.
f[4] From Aphrodite (Venus), to whom he had awarded the apple, prize
of beauty, in the contest of the "goddesses three."
f[5] Laurium was an Athenian deme at the extremity of the Attic
peninsula containing valuable silver mines, the revenues of which
were largely employed in the maintenance of the fleet and payment
of the crews. The "owls of Laurium," of course, mean pieces of money;
the Athenian coinage was stamped with a representation of an owl,
the bird of Athene.
f[6] A pun, impossible to keep in English, on the two meanings
of [the Greek] word which signifies both an eagle and the gable
of a house or pediment of a temple.
f[7] That is, birds' crops, into which they could stow away plenty
of good things.
f[8] The Ancients appear to have placed metal discs over statues
standing in the open air, to save them from injury from the weather, etc.
PISTHETAERUS
Birds! the sacrifice is propitious. But I see no messenger
coming from the wall to tell us what is happening. Ah! here comes
one running himself out of breath as though he were running the Olympic
stadium.
MESSENGER
Where, where is he? Where, where, where is he? Where, where, where
is he? Where is Pisthetaerus, our leader?
PISTHETAERUS
Here am I.
MESSENGER
The wall is finished.
PISTHETAERUS
That's good news.
MESSENGER
'Tis a most beautiful, a most magnificent work of art. The wall is
so broad that Proxenides, the Braggartian, and Theogenes could pass
each other in their chariots, even if they were drawn by steeds as big
as the Trojan horse.
PISTHETAERUS
'Tis wonderful!
MESSENGER
Its length is one hundred stadia; I measured it myself.
PISTHETAERUS
A decent length, by Posidon! And who built such a wall?
MESSENGER
Birds--birds only; they had neither Egyptian brickmaker, nor
stone-mason, nor carpenter; the birds did it all themselves; I could
hardly believe my eyes. Thirty thousand cranes came from Libya
with a supply of stones,[1] intended for the foundations. The water-
rails chiselled them with their beaks. Ten thousand storks were busy
making bricks; plovers and other water fowl carried water
into the air.
f[1] So as not to be carried away by the wind when crossing the sea,
cranes are popularly supposed to ballast themselves with stones,
which they carry in their beaks.
PISTHETAERUS
And who carried the mortar?
MESSENGER
Herons, in hods.
PISTHETAERUS
But how could they put the mortar into hods?
MESSENGER
Oh! 'twas a truly clever invention; the geese used their feet
like spades; they buried them in the pile of mortar and then emptied
them into the hods.
PISTHETAERUS
Ah! to what use cannot feet be put?[1]
f[1] Pisthetaerus modifies the Greek proverbial saying, "To what use
cannot hands be put?"
MESSENGER
You should have seen how eagerly the ducks carried bricks. To
complete the tale, the swallows came flying to the work, their beaks
full of mortar and their trowel on their back, just the way little
children are carried.
PISTHETAERUS
Who would want paid servants after this? But tell me, who did
the woodwork?
MESSENGER
Birds again, and clever carpenters too, the pelicans, for they
squared up the gates with their beaks in such a fashion that one would
have thought they were using axes; the noise was just like a dockyard.
Now the whole wall is tight everywhere, securely bolted and well
guarded; it is patrolled, bell in hand; the sentinels stand everywhere
and beacons burn on the towers. But I must run off to clean myself;
the rest is your business.
CHORUS
Well! what do you say to it? Are you not astonished at the wall
being completed so quickly?
PISTHETAERUS
By the gods, yes, and with good reason. 'Tis really not to be
believed. But here comes another messenger from the wall to bring us
some further news! What a fighting look he has!
SECOND MESSENGER
Oh! oh! oh! oh! oh! oh!
PISTHETAERUS
What's the matter?
SECOND MESSENGER
A horrible outrage has occurred; a god sent by Zeus has passed
through our gates and has penetrated the realms of the air without
the knowledge of the jays, who are on guard in the daytime.
PISTHETAERUS
'Tis an unworthy and criminal deed. What god was it?
SECOND MESSENGER
We don't know that. All we know is, that he has got wings.
PISTHETAERUS
Why were not guards sent against him at once?
SECOND MESSENGER
We have d[i]spatched thirty thousand hawks of the legion of Mounted
Archers.[1] All the hook-clawed birds are moving against him, the
kestrel, the buzzard, the vulture, the great-horned owl; they cleave
the air, so that it resounds with the flapping of their wings; they are
looking everywhere for the god, who cannot be far away; indeed, if I
mistake not, he is coming from yonder side.
f[1] A corps of Athenian cavalry was so named.
PISTHETAERUS
All arm themselves with slings and bows! This way, all our soldiers;
shoot and strike! Some one give me a sling!
CHORUS
War, a terrible war is breaking out between us and the gods! Come,
let each one guard Air, the son of Erebus,[1] in which the clouds
float. Take care no immortal enters it without your knowledge.
Scan all sides with your glance. Hark! methinks I can hear the
rustle of the swift wings of a god from heaven.
f[1] Chaos, Night, Tartarus, and Erebus alone existed in the beginning;
Eros was born from Night and Erebus, and he wedded Chaos and begot
Earth, Air, and Heaven; so runs the fable.
PISTHETAERUS
Hi! you woman! where are you flying to? Halt, don't stir! keep
motionless! not a beat of your wing! --Who are you and from what
country? You must say whence you come.[1]
f[1] Iris appears from the top of the stage and arrests her flight
in mid-career.
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